The most limpid love I've ever been able was wasted at twelve years old. I held your hand once during Mass, but every other interaction has been me making a fool of myself. I imagined you blameless these past twenty years-- I cried when you never returned. A Valentine remembered, small compliments recorded. 'Just maybe... Continue Reading →
Once, during a drug induced hallucination, I saw the age I was going to die. To my disappointment, I was already 2 years too late. Now, when bad things happen to me, I know it's because I'm not supposed to be here.
This was never meant to be a manifesto or really anything of real importance. I saw someone post on Reddit and thought I'd do the same here. I attended private Catholic school from kindergarten through the twelfth grade. Around seventh or eighth grade, I started entertaining the idea that all the things they were forcing... Continue Reading →
When I was a small child, we would get Halloween sale catalogs in the mail and my mom would give them to me for costume ideas . Without fail, I would always pick out the bondage masks and she told me no every time without an explanation. Later in life, I’d work in a porn... Continue Reading →
Having a young mother, I had to be an old child. It’s just now hitting me how I’ve always worried about her sadness, one which she created and wove us into. I was first-- I got the most. A little friend, her child sometimes. They never spoke behind closed doors and I heard it all... Continue Reading →
Went out with a guy once--didn’t, then did again. One night at his house, I was waiting for him to get ready so we could go out drinking. We didn’t want to go downtown and were discussing other options as I walked around his room, playing with a pair of handcuffs I found hanging on... Continue Reading →
It was the night you pulled me out of bed to go find Mommy. You brought me into a bar in my pajamas, the ones with the matching doll, the ones I went to the hospital in. She was there, drinking with her friends after work, the same place you met. It was your day... Continue Reading →